The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.
Quote from Thomas Szasz, Psychiatrist, Advocate for patients' rights, Manifesto creator (Materials in this post reproduced with the permission of Jeffrey A. Schaler. All rights reserved.).
The other day I was talking to a student about how some people don't like that others remember things. We both ended up laughing because I was trying to remember Szasz's quote and I couldn't. Double funny in that the quote was about remembering and what wise people remember.
Anyway, I do remember a coworker telling me that one of the bosses didn't like that I don't forget.
I do not think that this is the issue. The boss was extremely intelligent and he also didn't forget. I do think there are multiple other issues going on.
The boss didn't like to be reminded of things he didn't like to remember. Oiy, isn't that all of us! The key word in that sentence is "reminded."
Another issue is that I inartfully and without consideration of the consequences bring up past events. I "didn't read the room" with enough skill.
This came up once because I gave the boss some advice to make someone happy. A moneyless way to demonstrate that another employee was valued. The boss liked the idea and followed through with it and the person was appreciative.
Later, for a purely economic reason, the boss had to rescind this "boon" and replace it with another one. The employee expressed a certain level of dissatisfaction. The boss replayed the events to me and expressed how he didn't was unhappy with me. I ignored his tone and suggested that maybe if he had explained the economics behind the decision, the employee would have understood. The boss said, "Well, maybe I should talk to you about supersensitive employees."
The impression I got is that since I am super-sensitive, I could give insight. Hmmm. That I had a logic-based response was irrelevant. I had misread the room and actually I did not have the skill (and probably now still do not have the skill) to handle giving a suggestion in that type of situation.
Which is my point. Never forgetting is not the issue. The issue is how information is presented to the intended audience. Of course, Dr. Szasz's quote does not address what to do with the information that "wise" people do not forget.
Which leads to another quote:
It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it.
This one is from Maurice Switzer from 1906. The provenance of this phrase is explored in the wonderful blog Quote Investigator which dives into how this has been misattributed and paraphrased by others, including Lincoln and Twain.
Gratitudes: Ink cartridge refills, Tile, dust-busters.
Quote from Thomas Szasz, Psychiatrist, Advocate for patients' rights, Manifesto creator (Materials in this post reproduced with the permission of Jeffrey A. Schaler. All rights reserved.).
Anyway, I do remember a coworker telling me that one of the bosses didn't like that I don't forget.
I do not think that this is the issue. The boss was extremely intelligent and he also didn't forget. I do think there are multiple other issues going on.
The boss didn't like to be reminded of things he didn't like to remember. Oiy, isn't that all of us! The key word in that sentence is "reminded."
Another issue is that I inartfully and without consideration of the consequences bring up past events. I "didn't read the room" with enough skill.
This came up once because I gave the boss some advice to make someone happy. A moneyless way to demonstrate that another employee was valued. The boss liked the idea and followed through with it and the person was appreciative.
Later, for a purely economic reason, the boss had to rescind this "boon" and replace it with another one. The employee expressed a certain level of dissatisfaction. The boss replayed the events to me and expressed how he didn't was unhappy with me. I ignored his tone and suggested that maybe if he had explained the economics behind the decision, the employee would have understood. The boss said, "Well, maybe I should talk to you about supersensitive employees."
The impression I got is that since I am super-sensitive, I could give insight. Hmmm. That I had a logic-based response was irrelevant. I had misread the room and actually I did not have the skill (and probably now still do not have the skill) to handle giving a suggestion in that type of situation.
Which is my point. Never forgetting is not the issue. The issue is how information is presented to the intended audience. Of course, Dr. Szasz's quote does not address what to do with the information that "wise" people do not forget.
Which leads to another quote:
It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it.
This one is from Maurice Switzer from 1906. The provenance of this phrase is explored in the wonderful blog Quote Investigator which dives into how this has been misattributed and paraphrased by others, including Lincoln and Twain.
Gratitudes: Ink cartridge refills, Tile, dust-busters.
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